Friday, May 16, 2008

Letters to Various Places

Dear Netflix,
Thank you for your fabulous mail order service that (usually) guarantees that even if my Tivo runs out of television, I always have something to watch. However, I do not understand this week's mix up, sending me the movies "Hairspray" and "Ocean's Thirteen" instead of One Tree Hill Season Three Discs 3 and 4. I had timed their arrival out perfectly and planned a Friday and Saturday night viewing (one disc each night) with a staggered return to ensure I would not be without the next discs for more than a day. Now my schedule is shot and my Friday night looks bleak. I have only John Travolta in drag to keep me company.
Love, Lauren

Dear Mr. Bezos,

Thank you for the wonderful business you have created, Amazon.com. Thank you for employing my husband and for (hint hint) offering him a war heroes welcome and an even better job in a year. Thank you also for allowing me to get Friday Night Lights and 30 Rock on demand. However, why do you only feature One Tree Hill Season 5 on Unbox? I am two seasons behind and without disc three of season 3! Where is season 3??!!

Love, Lauren

Dear Mr. Jobs,

Thank you for providing the wonderful service that allows me to download fabulous covers of even more fabulous songs by my favorite American Idol. Thank you also for making it easy to buy my favorite New Kids on the Block songs without having to go to a store and admit that I really want this comeback to work. Your television selection is also very useful and our first wedding gift was Season One of Friday Night Lights from your service. Why, though, do you only feature Seasons 1, 4 and 5 of One Tree Hill? Where is season 3?? Why cannot I not download season 3 disc 3??? Who wins the race for Tree Hill mayor???? Do Nathan and Haley get back together?? If you can't help me, Mr. Jobs, who can?

Love, Lauren




2 comments:

mdoyle said...

Judging by these letters I can now understand why there was a picture of Bailey with her paw on the TV remote, She was having an intervention of her own to help with your One Tree Hill obession. Maybe you could just read the book?
But in the end it's what keeps your spirit up that counts!!

Mrs. Exnicios said...

Those who live in BBC America glass houses should not throw stones.